I compulsively bite my nails and it's disgusting. What's equally disgusting though is that anti-biting polish that always manages to ruin the taste and my enjoyment of finger food, so what's a girl to do?
Glue tiny pieces of plastic to her fingers apparently. Normally this is a pretty expensive solution as on the high street a pack of fake nails is between £5-10, but while googling 'Stiletto Nails' to decide which side of the line between 'LOVE' and 'HATE' they lie for me (spoiler, I love them in all their Disney Villain gloriousness) I discovered eBay.
A pack of 600 assorted sized nails came to the grand total of £4.50, so of course I impulse bought them.
|Louboutin Stiletto nails - black with gold glitter on top, red underneath|
They came unpainted in an opaque off white colour (although I could've opted for clear), and being ludicrously excited to finally have nails to paint I chose a moderately ambitious Christian Louboutin inspired manicure. The loose gold glitter that gorgeously adorns my nails now also coats my furniture. C'est la vie.
|As well as being pointy they are also ridiculously long|
The reason there's a hammer in the above two photos is because I don't plan ahead: giving myself a manicure before assembling my new Ikea furniture. I wanted to remember them in all their freshly painted glory before I destroyed them with my ill-informed carpentry. Surprisingly my new nails were not nearly as impractical as I'd imagined them to be as both my manicure, the furniture and my sanity were all still intact at the end of my first ever DIY house project.
|Also, they matched my eyeshadow perfectly|
And here's the manicure I gave myself yesterday morning: metallic duo-chrome gold and green, I keep catching glimpses of my nails out of the corner of my eye and mistake them for those beautifully iridescent beetles.
|Yes, that is a hand made Bedouin bangle|
I then realised my nails were a near perfect colour match for my eyes when I was struggling not to impale myself while putting in and removing contact lenses. I have iridescent beetle eyes apparently; that's sexy right?
So all in all what's the verdict for Stiletto nails? Personally I love them as they are strangely high fashion in a James-Bond-female-antagonist way, not nearly as impractical as they look nor in the least bit fragile. They also taking scratching itchy skin and scalp massages to a whole new level.
However things I would not recommend doing with these nails:
- Inebriated contact lens removal
- Boxing (or just punching anything really)
- Rock climbing
So essentially there goes my social and sporting life for the sake of some bad-ass nails. But I'm OK with that since I'm still partially crippled from the knee surgery that inspired me to start this blog.